Friday, August 27, 2004

Why does Bruce Springsteen hate America?

LiveDaily: "Marilyn O'Grady, the Conservative Party's long shot candidate for a New York U.S. Senate seat this November, has begun airing a 30-second 'Boycott the Boss' television advertisement that urges people to boycott Bruce Springsteen (news)'s music." Springsteen's projected Vote for Change tour in swing states aims to influence voters against Bush.

"Bruce Springsteen is doing a concert tour to dump President Bush," the ad says. "What's new? Springsteen criticized Reagan, bashed the New York police and said Bush should be impeached. He thinks making millions with a song-and-dance routine allows him to tell you how to vote. Here's my vote: Boycott the Boss. If you don't buy his politics, don't buy his music."

Criticized St. Ronald Reagan, who saved the world from communism? Enough said, I don't need to hear more about any of the Reagan policies a person might reasonably disagree with, he's GOT WINGS NOW AND A HALO. HE SITS AT THE RIGHT HAND OF GOD--HE MAY EVEN BE GOD IT'S TOO CLOSE TO CALL--GET IT? Godless atheist.

Bashed the New York police? Over what? Raping some foreign national in their custody with a broomstick? A few bad apples, past history, who cares, get over it, yadda yadda, but may the meme that Bruce dissed the NYPD live on until the last trump shall sound.

Says the President should be impeached? For what? I though a President had to commit high crimes and misdeameanors to warrant that. Where the hell does this Springsteen get off? Did Bush violate world peace and shred international law by preemptively invading a sovereign nation? Did he mislead the American people into said invasion by falsely claiming a threat of imminent attack? Has his administration tried to subvert the Bill of Rights and deny citizens their constitutional protections, has he undermined our national security by sheer negligence, by pursuing an illegal war against the wrong enemy, by destroying the---oh, I can't go on. I'm going to set myself on fire and hurl myself off the Kodak Building now.

Before I end my life as a flaming meteor of reproach to the treasons of Bruce Springsteen, I should mention that Professor Robert Westbrook will be teaching a Fall 2004 course called HIS 298 Music-Made America: Bruce Springsteen, wherein (it is to be hoped) the iniquities and baleful influence of Bruce Springsteen will be further dissected.